So the saying goes that every tiny nudge forward brings you one step closer to Forever. And wherever it may be, that place is somewhere I profoundly long to reach. Because on that pinnacle is how I know if everything Now makes any sense.
Eventually shall we be able to weigh the merit of this pursuit we boldly declared 'ideal'. In the full knowledge of its benefits, as well as the sacrifices it entailed. Should it even be labeled ideal at all?
The enterprise was at first motivated by a self-perceived need to justify our actions in front of others. You don't know how many friends relate pure distaste for such situations. But somehow along the way this purpose fell off, and what continues to drive this quest is an innate desire to keep believing. That what feels so right could not turn out to be too wrong.
Along the way too, I smell the flowers and sunshine. The march is not all a difficult one :) As I progress farther and farther from the onset, I realize that with each crossroad I face, new decisions require brand new evaluations. And they no longer constitute an accurate guage of that which they set out to determine.
Perhaps the answer I am looking for lies not in the destiny I will finally obtain, but in whether it belongs with you; perhaps I am seeking to find no answer at all. Because if the dreaded outcome should so unfortunately emerge, that's when my tracks are prematurely halted to a reluctant end.
It is not so much a test of speed as it is of stamina. But with my hand secured in yours, what does it matter that I should have to devote a whole lifetime to this journey.
2 comments:
Hey ok I might write a lot but much of what I write is rather brainless crap compared to your blog entries. Yeah I'm immediately reminded of Daniel's comments on your Friendster about how you're like one of the smartest and weirdest individuals he has ever met. Eh my brain is not working very well not (actually has not been working very well since school ended) so in respect of the gravity of most of your posts I shall not make any comments on them which might come across as flippant. But I guess ok at this point in time I could say one thign - if every girl thinks (and feels) as deeply as you do then I guess I'm destined to remain single forever liaoz ... haha
Hah, I just happen not to use the blog like a diary (partly because I already have one), but more as a platform for composing stuff that I don't get otherwise get to...I realize too, that the entries increasingly dwell on my relationship, so I guess I'm just being mushy more than anything most of the time :p Don't make the mistake of confusing flowery prose with intelligence, cos it's just ordinary ideas polished to a sheen.
And you know my blog title does caution that everything is served with a generous dash of salt? How could your comments be more flippant than my entries then? :) Please, leave your thoughts because I'd always wanna know :D And being the print-obssessed me, I'd almost certainly reply :p
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